Posts Tagged ‘emotional health’
Loneliness: A Temporary State or A Vulnerable Way of Life?
This article reviews a book by Guy Winch called Emotional First Aid. He writes about emotional distress caused by painful experiences including loneliness.
Guy says that loneliness most often occurs as a transient emotional state, say for example if you move to a new town, experience a loss, or as a child start a new school. In most cases this painful loneliness fades as you make new friends and join in with new things. However for some people they find themselves unable to extricate themselves from this state, and become more and more isolated, developing patterns which increase rather than reduce their loneliness.
A very moving and thought provoking article .
Loneliness: A Temporary State or A Vulnerable Way of Life? | Psychology Today.
Pain Relief Medicines reviews on top10pharma.net
23 Incredibly Empowering Quotes That Will Change Your Life
Every so often you come across a gem of a blog and here in my opinion is one such gem. Elle in her blog ‘reflectingalife.com’ talks about those times when we need to be inspired. When the negative self-talk begins to take over Elle has put together quotes to put you back on track. Elle believes repeating an empowering quote that resonates with you can be really beneficial and very effective at banishing those negative thoughts.
Take a look at the list and see which ones stand out to you. I think this might vary depending on how you are feeling today. My favourite one today is by someone unknown.
”It’s not who you are that holds you back, it’s who you think you’re not.”
The moral life of babies
We tend to think of newborn babies or very young babies as a blank canvas and it is the job of parents and other people around them to teach them about the difference between good and bad, how to be kind and think of others.
There has been recent research to suggest that this is not the case. The building blocks of compassion, empathy and moral reasoning are actually in place from birth.
The researchers carried out a number of experiments to investigate these factors. They discovered that one year olds will come to the help of strangers who are struggling and that they are also able to have sophisticated reasoning of good and bad.
This article is really worth a read and it has the links embedded into it of clips of a number of the experiments that were carried out. Fascinating!
How Do You Create a Healthy Relationship?
What does a healthy relationship look like? Any ideas? Therapist Alexander Katehakis writing for psychcentral.com attempts to answer this question.
She begins by stating that in any healthy relationship whether romantic or not the individual parties remain distinct and separate from each other. Allowing the other person to grow and change but also giving room for them to make mistakes is also key. In a healthy relationship problems are resolved as each takes responsibility for their part in the difficulty and they work together to resolve the issue. This article sets out the ideal for us all to aim for. Let me know what you think!
How Do You Create a Healthy Relationship? | World of Psychology.
Take Two Steps to Self-Confidence
‘’Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that? We must have perseverance and above all confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something and that this thing must be attained’’. Marie Curie
If you happened to watch the final episode of the IT Crowd (a comedy about a technical support group in a large company) you will have seen Moss, an awkward but endearing character, get a great tip from his boss about how to be more confident. What was it I hear you ask? ‘To wear women’s trousers’. It works for his boss so Moss gives it a try. He puts on his women’s slacks just like Superman puts on his superhero outfit in situations where more confidence is called for! It works!!
If only it could be that simple.
Let’s begin by defining the word confidence. Collins dictionary defines it simply by stating that confidence is a belief in your own abilities. This belief in your own ability can have an effect on every aspect of your life. Self- confidence shows in the way you behave, your body language, what you say and how you say it.
Self -confident people do what they believe is right, are willing to take risks and therefore stretch themselves. If they mess up they will readily admit their mistakes and learn from them. People with low self- confidence are constantly concerned by what other people think and alter their behaviour accordingly. They dislike risk and prefer to stay in their comfort zone. They will tend to cover up mistakes before anyone notices (Mindtools.com).
Do you recognise any of these thoughts or actions in yourself or any you know?
Building Self Confidence
Building self- confidence is achievable if you are determined and focused. You can approach this in two parts.
Step 1
This is all about reflection on your life so far and then thinking about where you want to aim for. What have you achieved in your life so far and what are your strengths?
What are you good at? Write it down!
Now it’s time to set a goal, this could be something in the near future or something further ahead that could have smaller goals to get there. It’s worth making this goal something specific that is realistic and achievable in a certain time frame. When thinking about your goal there are lots of things you can do to improve your confidence. A goal such as ‘be better’ isn’t going to get you very far. A goal such as ‘exercise once a week’’ or ‘sort out my wardrobe by Friday next week and buy a couple of items that flatter me’ is much more achievable. Research has shown that regular exercise and dressing better really do improve confidence!
Step 2
When you set out towards achieving your long term goal of improved confidence small successes along the way will make all the difference. Celebrating your successes will keep you thinking positively; enjoy it! If you do have failures then look at them as all part of the learning process. Don’t let them stop you from achieving your goal.
Confidence is all wrapped up with Self Esteem; how you feel about being you. If you feel you need help with confidence issues or self -esteem seeking professional help is a very good option. Here at Manchester Institute for Psychotherapy we have experienced counsellors and therapists who can help you with dealing with the confidence issues you may have and provide you with tools and strategies so you can move forward in your life. Our emphasis is on friendliness and providing a safe and warm environment. You can phone the Institute on: 0161-862-9456 to book your initial assessment or contact us via email.
Growing Through Shame
Michael Sallas starts by saying that shame is something we humans try to avoid. We naturally avoid physical and emotional pain by distracting ourselves, compartmentalising things and making ourselves feel numb. He asks the question ‘How can we grow if we don’t feel a certain level of discomfort?’
When we walk through shame, when we feel vulnerable it could be the start of a new beginning. If you take full responsibility for who you are and what decisions you have made, you really can start to work things out.
9 Ways to Boost Your Brain and Mood
Here is a practical article to help you to boost your brain and improve your mood. The first two suggestions are a great starting point. Get a check up and get your medications checked. Certain health conditions can impact on your brain and your mood and so can certain medications.
Practical suggestions like getting enough sleep, exercising and eating well are also here but Therese puts her own spin on these with her wealth of experience behind her. Advice is also included about getting connected, even if you really don’t want to, mindfulness and de-stressing techniques. The final suggestion is to get thinking; get your brain busy, just reading the newspaper each day or doing a crossword puzzle regularly can be good for your brain.
The Friendship Bank
What sort of person are you? Do you put a lot of effort into helping others without much regard to what you gain in return from them? If so you are a person with high ‘communal orientation’ and people like you have been shown in new research to be generally happier than those with low communal orientation.
However people who do give a lot of their time to help their friends do still expect to count on them; but they run the risk that they will not be there when they do need a hand.
Take some time to read this interesting article as it will really get you thinking about your relationships.
The Friendship Bank: How and Why Even the Most Giving Friend Expects Payback – WSJ.com.
Authenticity and Identity
This article really got me thinking today. Bob Edelstein writing for psychology today says
‘Discovering who you are in the moment modifies your already established identity.’
We have all established our identities as we grow up and we tend to think of them as static and stable. Edelstein argues that this is not really the case at all but that our identities are subjective, fluid and chosen by us in the moment. This is because our identity changes in response to everything that happens in our lives; good and bad.
Take a read as he includes a case study of Bill who identified himself as a ‘nice generous person with a positive attitude.’ See what he discovered about himself and his identity with the help of therapy.
7 Top Habits of High Achievers
Do you know what separates the successful from the ordinary? Swati Chauhan thinks she does. She says that the answer greatly lies in the habits practiced by them over and over again so much so that they become intertwined with their personality.
High achievers seem to have worked out which areas in their lives to work hard at and she gives us some pointers in the right direction.
Firstly move from procrastination to acting on things today and create opportunities for yourself. She also says that we need to follow a regime without getting bored or giving up; we need to be dedicated and disciplined.
Take a look at her article to get inspired!
http://www.theeurekalife.com/the-7-top-habits-of-high-achievers/